Teddy meets her father's estranged Uncle Mel. 泰迪遇见她父亲疏远的舅舅梅尔。
What are you doing?
Squeezing in my cardio, working up a sweat.
Okay. Well, can you sweat on PJ's sandwich?
Gotta feel the burn.
Gotta buy my lunch!
Hey, honey. Honey!
嘿 亲爱的 亲爱的
I'm leaving for work.
come on, Give me a kiss.
Catch me if you can.
I've kissed you enough already.
Wow, I guess it's true:
Breakfast is the most disturbing meal of the day.
Wait. Whoa whoa whoa. Bob, wait.
等等 喂 喂 喂 鲍伯
I forgot to tell you something.
It's about your Uncle Mel... he called.
I don't wanna hear it.
Oh, come on! He begged me to pass on the message.
Thank you, and now I'm going to pass on the message.
那谢谢你 风很大 听不见
Who's Uncle Mel?
Somebody you'll never know.
He's your father's uncle.
Okay, so you told me about Uncle Stanley
Who knits sweaters for his cats,
But you didn't want to tell me about Uncle Mel?
if you don't have anything nice to say about someone,
Then don't say anything at all.
And Mel's an idiot.
Okay, mom, tell me about Uncle Mel.
好了 妈妈 快跟我讲讲这个梅尔大叔
Well, he and your father had some kind of falling out.
是这样的 他跟你爸 有一段不堪回首的过去
That's all I know.
Isn't there some way we can find out more?
This is the first interesting thing about dad since...
Well, this is the first interesting thing about dad.
Honey, trust me. I've learned the hard way:
宝贝 相信我吧 我可是有过前车之鉴的
When it comes to Duncan family drama,
Are there any other Surprise relatives
you want to tell me about?
Today's all burnt toast
running late, and dad says
Has anybody seen my left shoe
I close my eyes, take a bite
Grab a ride, laugh out loud
There it is up on the roof
哎呀 老爸 鞋子就在房顶上
I've been there, I've survived
So just take my advice
Hang in there, baby,
Things are crazy
But I know your future is bright
Hang in there, Baby
There is no maybe
Everything turns out all right
Sure life is up and down
But trust me, it comes back all around
You're gonna love who you turn out to be
Hang in there, Baby
Great news, mom. I like Charlie now.
大好消息 妈妈 我现在开始喜欢小查莉啦
Well, finally. What happened?
是么 总算有这天啊 发生什么事了
We were in the park and this photographer
Thought that Charlie was the cutest baby ever.
He offered to pay her a hundred bucks to use her as a model.
Who knew? She's actually good for something
Besides drooling and pooping.
"Walter Louper photography.
Specializing in dogs, cats and babies."
Forget it. I'm not exploiting my baby.
But we don't have a dog or a cat.
Mom, come on.
This could be a big break for Charlie.
PJ, Charlie is not getting a job before you do.
Well, the photographer didn't offer to shoot me.
Ha. You don't have to have a modeling job.
Any job will do. Come here.
Man, this conversation sure took an ugly turn.
Anyway, we will not be needing this.
I knew we should've done it my way.
What was your way?
We don't tell mom we're doing the photo shoot,
We go ahead and do it anyway and split the money.
When did you come up with that?
At the park.
I told you when The girls' cross-country team ran by.
What were we talking about again?
Hi, Charlie. Teddy here.
嗨 小查莉 泰迪姐在这儿呢
So it turns out there's a Duncan family mystery.
Yeah, yesterday I found out we have an Uncle Mel.
Does this look good on me?
Well, only if you pull your pants over your face,
because that is a belt.
We need to go to the mall today.
You don't have anything new for me to wear.
Okay, Ivy, I'm thinking about something
好了 艾薇 我现在考虑的是
a little bit more important than clothes.
You're funny, T.
Something went down between my dad and his Uncle Mel
And I have to know what happened.
What is this?
Oh, that's a credit card my dad gave me a while ago.
And I'm just now hearing about this?
Well, it's for emergencies only.
Honey, I've seen your closet.
It is an emergency.
Okay. Well, if you go to the rest home with me,
I will go to the mall with you.
Okay, but I have to warn you:
My grandpa was in a rest home
And it was depressing. He'd just sit there
And complain about how nobody ever came to visit.
Finally, I just stopped going.
We have several options at Shady Hills:
There's the one-year plan, the three-year plan and the fi...
有一年计划 三年计划 还有五
How old is your father?
You might want to go month to month.
Welcome to Shady Hills. How can I help you?
We're here to see Mel Duncan.
Have you signed in?
Are you waiting for a formal invitation?
No, we just got here. We're happy to sign in.
没有 我们刚到这儿 很愿意先登记一下
I'd be most honored.
Let me page Mel for you.
Mel, you have a visitor!
Somebody here to see me?
Hi, Uncle Mel.
I'm your great-niece Teddy. I'm Bob's daughter.
You're kidding. Bob made you?
Yeah, well, my mom's pretty hot.
哦 是啊 我妈很靓的
Oh, this is my friend Ivy.
Hi. My mom's hot too.
Hey, everybody, this is my niece...
喂 乡亲们 看看我的侄孙女
What did you say your name was again?
No no, Teddy. Teddy.
不不 是泰迪 泰迪
That's a weird name.
Weirder than hedy?
This is my niece Teddy
And... do you like music?
I love music.
Hey, everybody, my niece is gonna sing us some songs.
嘿 乡亲们 我的侄孙女要给大家唱几首歌
And welcome to...
The room that we're in.
We're gonna start off with a little...
I think I remember "Swanee River."
Way down upon the Swanee River
far far away...
I don't remember the words.
I only know the dirty ones from third grade.
It's such a funny name for a river
And that's all I have to say, hey.
Okay, that's enough of that. Let's try something else.
好了 这首唱够了 我们唱点别的吧
It's almost ready to go.
You've got a real cute baby there,
One of the best I've ever seen.
Yeah yeah, did you bring the cash?
I did, but first I need a parent to sign this release form.
Sure. Mom is right in the kitchen.
Gabe, why don't you go into the kitchen
And have mom sign this for us?
So you're a photographer, huh?
Oh, I got a camera for my seventh birthday...
Then I lost it.
Well, here you go.
Your mom has very nice... Printing.
You know, before we start the session
I probably better go talk to her.
Very bad idea.
And why is that?
Because she's in one of her moods
And now she wants more money.
She does? How much?
One twenty five.
But we agreed on one hundred.
Walter, I've been riding
this rollercoaster for the past seventeen years.
Let me handle it.
This is a strange situation.
The moms almost always want to meet me.
This one just wants her money.
Pack it up. The show's over.
What? What happened?
She wants you out.
You don't understand. I have a deadline to meet.
We have to make this work.
Well, you might want to offer her one and fifty.
Fine. One fifty, but that's it.
好吧 一百五就一百五 不过这是底线了
Let me see what I can do.
Let's make some magic.
And my baby sister's name is Charlie.
Didn't your dad know any girl names?
Speaking of my dad,
What exactly happened between you guys?
You don't want to hear about that.
Actually, I do.
Well, look. We just met
And I'd like to get to know someone
Before I start saying bad things about their father.
Okay. Well, let's get to know each other.
Tell me about yourself.
Well, I love baseball.
Hey, there's a game today. Will you take me?
对了 今天有场比赛啊 你能带我去不
Tell me other things about yourself.
Oh, come on. I haven't been to a ballgame in forever.
哎呀 求你了 我都很久没去看过什么球赛了
I'd give anything to go to one.
I don't know. I promised my friend...
yeah yeah, fine, thanks.
知道了 知道了 算了吧 谢谢
Thanks for dropping by.
See you in twenty years. I'll be sitting right here.
T. You've got to try this.
What is it?
Steak and potatoes.
They can blend anything in this place.
Okay, Ivy. Hey.
好吧 艾薇 听着
What would you say to a little change in plans?
Am I gonna like this change?
It involves us getting out of here.
We're going to a ballgame.
Fine, then stay here.
Mel, come on, let's go.
梅尔 来吧 我们出发了
We're going to the ballgame.
Hot dog! Sounds great, but
first we've got to get past the warden.
I'll handle her.
Excuse me. I'd like to take Mel out for the afternoon.
Are you over eighteen years of age?
Is he dead?
Step away from the desk.
Thank you for your time.
- Right. - Break.
- 很好 - 行动
I'm sorry, dude.
It's for a good cause.
We've got a roller!
Not on my watch we don't.
You having a good time, Uncle Mel?
Oh, this is terrific, kid.
哦 真是太精彩了 孩子
Thanks for bringing me.
So listen. You said when we got to the game
You were going to tell me the story about... whoo!
...What happened between you and dad.
After this inning.
Hot stuff coming through.
Ivy! Ivy, what is all this?
艾薇 艾薇 你这买的都是些什么
It's your fault for giving me a credit card.
Right. The emergency credit card.
Some of this stuff could be used in an emergency.
Right, like if we run into a giant foam nose.
It looks like he's having fun.
yeah Such a sweet old guy.
Who could possibly have a problem with him?
Are you a ballplayer or a ballerina?!
You make me want to puke!
<i>She's a star, going far</i>
<i>There you are, su-su-superstar</i>
<i>Su-su-superstar, yeah, come on</i>
<i>Looks all right, ladylike, day and night</i>
从早到晚 完美行头 贵妇装扮
<i>Come on, su-su-superstar</i>
<i>Grooving the runway from Monday through Sunday</i>
<i>She wrote the book, got the look, on every magazine, love her</i>
<i>Superstar, superstar, that's what you are</i>
超级巨星 超级巨星 你天生就是啊
<i>Su-su-superstar, yeah, a superstar</i>
超超超级巨星 耶 一个超巨星呀
<i>Yeah, a superstar, that's what you are</i>
Careful, cupcake! If you slide, you might dirty your skirt!
小心点 软脚虾 滑垒的时候当心脏了你的裙子
Hey, Uncle Mel, calm down. We're winning.
嘿 梅尔叔公 冷静点 我们领先着呢
Yeah, for now, but it ain't gonna last.
是啊 暂时的 但不会维持多久
Because they stink! Like a sewer, they stink!
Hey, control your grandpa! He's scaring my kids.
喂 管好你家老爷子 他把我孩子都吓着了
Hey, your kids stink.
Sorry. He didn't mean that.
I'm sure your kids smell awesome.
Okay, Uncle Mel, why don't you just sit down
好了 梅尔叔公 不如我们好好坐下来吧
And enjoy a nice, quiet hot dog?
I'd love a hot dog. Hey, weiner, have a weiner!
我爱吃热狗 喂 臭肠子 吃我一根香肠
Are you gonna do something about him or should I?
Yeah, I said I'd handle it and it would be
a lot easier without your helpful suggestions.
Oh, well, here's a helpful suggestion:
Take him out of here or I take you out of here.
Oh, you shouldn't have said that,
'cause now Ivy's about to get out of her chair.
T, hold my ring.
Okay, can we all just chill?
Hey, losers! Get a load of this!
喂 落水狗们 好好瞧瞧这个
Oh no, we're on the jumbo screen.
Are we almost done?
'cause if not, we're kinda getting into overtime.
Is that a problem?
Not for us.
But for mom. I think it's gonna cost you.
Exactly what I was thinking, little brother.
I'm gonna run this by the boss
Mom. What are you doing here?
I live here.
But you're not supposed to be back yet.
Well, I finished everything I needed to do...
got the car washed,
Did the grocery shopping, went to the bank.
What is that flashing coming from the living room?
Oh, it's probably a fuse.
You might want to check the fuse box out in the garage.
Get out! Shut it down!
What's going on?
Mom's home. She's really home.
What's going on here?
PJ, you want to take that one?
No, I'll take the next one.
I can't believe you two disobeyed me.
Oh, my poor little baby.
I love it... mom and baby.
Look. Please stop. Just get out.
听着 别拍了 赶紧走吧
But you look so good together.
No, seriously... get out.
不 我说真的 出去
Perfect. Just like that.
And how about a little of this?
Wait. Get my better side.
Wow. Mom, you're a natural.
哇 老妈 你真是天生做明星的料
Yeah, the camera loves you.
You two are so grounded.
Then the police politely asked us to leave,
At which point Uncle Mel invited them to kiss something
That had been on the jumbo screen.
因为大家当时都被大屏幕照着呢（注：美国职棒大联盟比赛不成文约定 当大屏幕转到观众席 被照到的相邻两人必须亲吻）
Oh, good. All right.
呃 不错 行了
Now you know
why I wanted you to stay away from your Uncle Mel.
The guy's a maniac, especially when it comes to baseball.
Yeah, that would've been useful information.
You know what? Just go to bed.
I really don't want to talk about this anymore.
Well, there is one more thing
I should tell you about Uncle Mel.
Yeah? What's that?
He's in the living room.
You have to talk to him.
No, I don't. I don't. I've got nothing to say to him.
不 我不要 不要 我跟他没什么好说的
What is this all about, anyway? Why won't anybody tell me?
Because it's ancient history.
All right? It's done. It's forgotten about.
行吧 都过去了 大家都快忘了
I've moved on. Now get that old fart out of my house!
Be right back.
So dad says welcome.
He doesn't want to talk to me, does he?
Well, I don't want to talk to him either!
And you can tell him I said that.
I'll be right back.
Uncle Mel says he loves you.
Uncle Mel said that?
Yeah, he said something like that.
It's so long since I've been in the living room.
Well, when is he gonna leave the living room?
Okay, Uncle Mel wants to sort this thing out.
Maybe you should start.
I think he should start.
I'll be right back.
Dad says he loves you.
And he thinks it would help
if you told me what this feud was about.
When your father was ten years old,
I was his baseball coach.
Oh. Now I get it.
What's that supposed to mean?
Well, you get a little bit too excited about baseball.
I share my opinions!
Anyway, I gave him some constructive criticism...
You said I swung like a girl!
I was sugar-coating it! You swung like a baby girl!
Hey, we're talking. This is a start.
嘿嘿 大家开始谈话啦 这是个好的开始
You humiliated me in front of the entire team.
I was trying to make you better.
Well, you didn't yell at any of the other kids.
Because I didn't care about any of the other kids, fathead!
Whoa. Did you hear that?
Before the fathead part.
He said he cared about you.
I was trying to make you tough and...
And I guess
sometimes I got a little carried away.
We have an apology. Hey, dad.
我方得到一个道歉耶 嘿 老爸看你的
Well, maybe sometimes I was a little oversensitive...
And I'm sorry.
And a return apology.
Now you know what we do in this family after we fight?
I'm hoping eat.
Hugging's for girls.
I gotta tinkle.
Be back in twenty minutes.
Right over there.
You did good, kid. Thank you.
你做得很好 孩子 谢谢你
Yeah, well, you guys are always saying
how important family is.
Yes. Yes, it is.
是啊 是啊 确实很重要
He just walked into the'?
I'm afraid so.
Hey, Mel, That's not a bathroom.
喂 梅尔 那边不是洗手间
It is now!
Well, Charlie, here I am waiting for you and mom,
好啦 小查莉 现在我在这儿等你和妈妈呢
'cause mom said I have to see this, whatever this is.
Here we come.
Look at you two!
Why are you dressed like that?
Well, we had a casting.
In the professional modeling business,
That's what an audition is called...
So you're a professional model now?
Oh, don't act surprised, Teddy.
哦 别表现的太惊奇 泰迪
I think we all knew this day was coming.
She's a model now.
If I knew raising parents was gonna be this hard,
Never would've done it.
But soon enough it'll be your turn
So good luck, Charlie.
PJ Duncan, here to see my parents.
I'll be right with you, PJ.
I'm in the middle of class. We're really gonna push it.
We're gonna touch our toes.
And touch your toes.
Or your knees.
You know what? Just do the best you can.
Okay, now we're gonna squat.
Oh, take it down! Gotta feel the burn.
好 蹲下 感觉到燃烧了吗
Here we go.
Bob, I'm locked again.
Here, mom. I gotcha.
来吧 妈妈 我来扶你
Oh, thank you, PJ.
哦 谢谢你 PJ
Oh, sorry I'm late, guys.
哦 对不起我来迟了 家人们
That was a long walk in from the parking lot.
That's what happens when you don't do the squats.